How many times until you have your perfect picture?

One of the most annoying things to my family is probably how many flashes are cast in front of them a day. I try to be a picture fanatic. It is easy with the kids because in my eyes every picture is perfect of them. So there I go. Click, click, click. However not so easy when it comes to a picture I am in. Click, then look, then delete, and then try again. I am sure Phillip gets so annoyed. I would like to think that it doesn't have anything to do with vanity but unfortunately it does. When I see a picture of myself I immediately wonder what will the next person seeing it think? I guess that is the reason for a hundred pictures until I like one that I feel comfortable sharing. When I am posing with my kids I always see myself as happy and my smile is so big. When it is with Phillip, I see a woman who is goofy smiling from ear to ear. Then when it is just me I see way too much. I see a woman who doesn't look anything like she did 10 years ago. I see a woman who doesn't deserve all that she has. I see a woman who wants someone else to be in that picture with her because she doesn't like being alone. I can honestly say that out of all the pictures shot of me this year that there may be 3 at the most that I can be okay with. Isn't that sad? Then I think about God and I wonder. What does His photo album of me look like? When do I look perfect for Him? Does He see the same vanities and insecurities that I see? Well of course not. Every picture is priceless to Him. He loves the ones with me and the kids. He laughs hysterically at the ones when I am alone in the car singing my praises sounding like a hyena. He has framed the ones of me in my bedroom teary eyed as I pray to Him. Oh yeah He loves those. The one thing I would bet is that in every picture of my life God has super imposed Himself in each and every one. I would be amazed to see the pictures of my kids and I on the beach and in the far left God has His arm around Nickolas. Then I have a picture of Phillip running on the beach with the kids following Him. How amazing is that picture going to look with Jesus running right along side Jocie?

I can't wait to see all of my wedding moments with my Father holding both mine and Phillip's hand as He joins us in perfect unity. I guess in the end all that matters is that God finds perfection in me every time He sees me. That is increasingly hard to grasp at times but I know it is so true. See I am not perfect in any way but His love for me is perfect. If He dwells within in me and I allow the Spirit to shine in me then I am nothing but perfect to Him. I delight in knowing that my God never looks at the snapshot and thinks to Himself, "Wow I need to take another one. That moment isn't worth keeping." Every moment living in God's love is priceless and never worthy of deleting. Even if it is a photo of sadness or anger, I know that God values it because He is in it with me. How I only hope that He has copies to give me of every single one so I will never forget. God bless to all of my faithful friends and followers.

Psalm 89:14-16

Righteousness and justice are the foundation of your throne;

love and faithfulness go before you.
Blessed are those who have learned to acclaim you,

who walk in the light of your presence, O LORD.
They rejoice in your name all day long; they exult in your righteousness.